Waiting for you today

Sunday, October 17, 2010


I told myself to not worry too much that I will see you today. Even as late as 8pm. Time went by and I felt like a fool. Waiting and waiting for something that was not mine. I didn't want to bother you so I didn't text you as much. But I was constantly checking my phone to see if you would text me about your whereabouts, but there was nothing... I looked to you for an answer and some comforting words that maybe, just maybe we could see each other soon. But there was nothing. I had to comfort myself and tried to occupy my mind with other things so that time would fly by fast enough.

I sat there dressed and ready. But like a bride at the altar, my groom never came. The weekend was slowly coming to an end. You knew how much I wanted to see you. You knew we weren't going to meet Saturday. You could have saved today. Why didn't you? Why didn't you wake me up before it all started to crumble? Maybe... I could see you for a second before everything went downhill. I cried and I cried. Why me? Why today? Why the weekends?

From hopeful to hopeless. I'm was angry and irritated, but still I was holding to a slim chance. Until you tell me that you don't know. When did my knight in shining armor becomes useless? Why isn't he fighting for us? I guess we should of ended last week. I should of stayed strong and let you go. However, I gave us a chance. And now I feel like a fool. I wish you were honest with me. Why did you lie to me? Even the smallest thing. You knew. You knew. I am so sad and broken.

When I wrote my goodbye letter, tears were running down my eyes like a gushing water fall that never ends. I felt every drop on my face. Even after it all, I was still hoping that you would show up in front of my house and convinced me to leave with you. You could have done so much. You could of called me. You knew I wanted to see your face and hear your voice. But you were so cruel. You didn't do any of that! Every time that I have faith in you, you disappoint me. I just hope you would hold true to your words and stand up for what you believe in. And follow your heart!

You know that I will never be the same. That I will cry myself to sleep every night. And when I think of you I will burst out crying as well. Sadness is what I am feeling. No, I won't hate you. Don't think you can take the short cut out of this.

Rainy Day

i love rain. i love looking out the window and stare at the rain falling down. slanting rain, straight rain, rain that comes down in buckets, or sprinkly rain. what i don't love is, when my entire feet and socks and shoes are soaking wet from walking a freaking mile from the parking lot to my class. and every path on campus is flooded with water, so its impossible to avoid those puddles! i need to buy rain boots...

just leave

I don't think you care anymore.

Blue

sit still.
and
listen.

What now?

I'm walking, walking...walking. Laughter, smile, jokes, and infatuation. Yet everything turns up on a dead end street.

Maybe I hate you.

Dear you, maybe I hate you.
No I lied, I do not hate you. But I would like to say, "Go fuck your self until you bleed into a coma." No, I wouldn't do that either, that would be too mean for my standard. Why would I waste such energy on hating you. Why am I still wasting energy thinking about you? All the hurt you have caused me, I still can not let go. It's been a couple of years since we last interact. But I would like to see you again, put away the hurt, and fully embrace you and wish all the best for you. Maybe I'll be able to let go the hurt if I see you again. Maybe we can be friends again. We were childhood friends once, so lets come to some sort of closure, so I can stop hurting every time I see you in a picture and wishing that you'll trip and break your face. j/k!

Be still my heart,
for you can not falter.
Cease your tempo,
suppress your temptation,
and let me wither.

Bang Bang

My heart is beating out of control.
I drugged it with coffee on an empty stomach.

A love like this

I want a love like this. A love where I own nothing.
A love where I can safely turn to...with out guilt, selfishness, or fear.
A love in which I can be raw in.

Dear You

Maybe I do want to hold your hand.
Maybe you do make me smile.
Maybe I am starting to love the way you grin at me.
Just maybe's.

Tell me...

Would it be possible...do you think?...For each short time being together with you, I get a rush. But I would hit the epitome of inexplicable chemistry if you would just give me your consent.

The Days Without Guys - Year 2 Day Unknown

To me, this is what best friends look like.

To me, this is what family looks like.



And to me, this is what love looks like.

Basically, those are all the things that I need to make me happy. I don't ask for much. Just for someone to be there for me when I need them. Because of these people, I am at the happiest I have ever been ever. And I appreciate it all. I can't believe that it's happening to me though.

Until Next Time,
Che Dau Xanh

Hello You...

my aren't you cute...

Year 2 Day 276

i'm bored. i'm going to vietnam and china after i graduate from college in 2 years :] my parents already promised and make plans so my father and i could visit china. he is like obsessed with their history all his life. i think their history is fascinating. even the evil and corrupted parts

oh, what to say. what to say.

do you believe in love? 'cause i sure don't.

romantic love, i meant...

click click

So the pictures in the previous posts are from VN. Click on them for a larger view!
I wanted to post up some scenery, but that would be just more work.

something something comes this way...

She's a brat. I got into an argument with her and end up making her cry. PWNED! j/k!


Just because I'm that strong :)


After school, I totally love this little cousin of mine.


This is a pet of an uncle of mine and he's an arrogantly snippy. He chased me in the lawn one morning trying to snap my ankles off. He has a sharp beak with an obnoxious voice box.


Stupid bird...


At the ocean catching...what not.


Someone took this picture of us. I love it.


She's buying tangerines! We were sight seeing (just mostly me)


He was infatuated with the camera.


2 of my uncles and my paternal grandmother. Due to an eye disease, her pupils were a clouded blue, which I thought were cool looking.


2 of my favorite people now.


I love this kid. I can't wait to see how he is when he grows up, he has such charm.


something something something...


He talks a lot, which was amusing

Peekaboo! Up at Da Lat. Blinding sun.


Chau and her cousin.


Chau and moi.


Om Non Non!


I hated my hair that morning.



Her cousin snapped this picture of us. He took so many because he kept cutting me off or the picture was tilted. -___-;


Gangsta Chau!


Finally, a good picture of us both.


I is a lonnnerrrr.


Hahaha.


That tree was pretty awesome looking.


Hatting on the fish trash can. I thought those trash cans were pretty cool, I want one.


Her bronze lover.


Somewhere...


SMILE!

The Boats

So many blue boats, so rich in color, so vibrant in life.


Hello men! They were nice to stay out while I snapped a picture at them, because this one other guy turned away.


More blue boats

People on boats...

Boats, boats, Boats


The woman on our canoe!