The Days Without Guys - Year 2 Day 260

Just a little something I'm doing for a friend :D It's not done yet though.

ahh....random posting of vietnamese song lyric.................

"Phút cuối không nghe được em nói
không nhìn được một lần
dù một lần đơn sơ"

Dear You...

I think you're as beautiful as they come. The way you view the world so indifferently has me heart bound. I'm just mesmerize by the shiftiness of your eyes and the cowardice of your stance.

For Maddie

The Days Without Guys - Year 2 Day 258

The closer I get to adulthood, the more my parents treat me as if I'm a child. I don't understand.

I go to school and get good grades. I make sure my little brother eats and that he always has money. I go to work.

I try my best to not do anything to make them not let me stay out for a little bit. I stay out late at least once every 2 months. And late is about 12 am, not even. And I don't know what to say. What do you say when your mom kicks you out? What do you say when your dad tells you that you're a disappointment to the family? What do you say when your parents tell you that you're giving them a bad reputation?

All of this has to do with one thing. RELIGION.

My family is making me dislike my religion more and more. And I cannot convert because I don't want to be that disrespectful. But everything always relates to religion. Who made up religion? Why should I have guidelines on how to live my life? It's my life, I should be able to do what I want. It's not fair that I work my fucking ass off in school and at work then I go out for a little bit and I get yelled at as an award. What did I do to deserve this?

These questions probably will never be answered. As of now, they just want me in the house just because. And I am sick and tired of being treated as if I am 5 years old. I am sick of it.

Until next time,
Che Dau Xanh

The Days Without Guys - Year 2 Day 257

I am depressed once again. Planning out the rest of my 2 years of college as well as financial situations makes me utterly depressed and wonder if this is worth it. If spending 10 goddamn years of my life in school is worth it. Well, 8 I should say. 2 down. 8 to go. A lot of people look or think of me as crazy whenever I tell them that. I guess not everyone knows what they want in life and not everyone has that kind of patient. I don't either but I always try to think in the long run, I'll benefit from this...

Apparently these days, my only free times are 11-12 at night. The rest of my day involves babysitting and not getting any time for myself. Hell, I can't even sit down for 30 minutes at home without someone or something bothering me or going out for even ONE freaking hour without a phone call asking where I am and why am I not home and when will I be back so they can leave. How am I surviving this, you wonder? I question the same thing. -_________-

This girl I know in high school spent like 3 weeks this summer in Europe on a tour to England, Scotland, etc. I am utterly super jealous of her. When will it be my turn to go on a vacation and relax for a while?!?!? And plus I'm quite mad about Europe. It's where I yearn to belong there someday...haha. The United States makes me depressed. I hate it here.

Yep. Whenever I have nothing to say I post up random stuff but whenever I do, it's absolutely endless, it seems.

Sorry I don't have a cute picture every time I post like Banh Xeo there :/

How do you...

Actually Piglet...it's spelled L-O-V-E. And it comes crashing in like when you get hit with a tsunami of fluffy pillows. Unexpected and surreal. But oh what a ride it'll be.

Hit it right

How many times have that happened? You were just standing right there, only to dispersed when I turn around to seek you out. But I remember one time...as I stood still, I heard your foot steps coming closer and closer, your voice getting louder and louder and my heart beating faster and faster.

The Days Without Guys - Year 2 Day 254

my mother thinks that i should never get married. i don't blame her. commitment these days are as thin as a paper. therefore, you'll be tearing off my paper heart once you go breaking my heart. paper comes from tree which is need for life... my paper heart is of high importance, so don't trash it. at least recycle it so someone else can treasure it.

A Tickle

Like how you used to smile at me, propelling my heart to dance...and willing itself to burst.

The Days Without Guys - Year 2 Day 252

let's keep this blog alive again like it was 2 years+ ago when we had like 10 posts in a single day. i laughed when i was reading Che Ba Mau's post about flowers and chocolate. i must agree with her giving flowers to someone is quite romantic yet pointless at the same time. they whither and die in like 3 days. i'm not a huge fan of chocolate myself since it makes you fatttt. i prefer something worthwhile and more realistic, such as brand name handbags or jewelry or soccer jerseys! man, they are expensive yet i still pour all the money i have into it -_-" ... not only do they last more than flowers you can also use it for a longgg time too. or just give me money. i'll be just fine with that :D

i'm another one of those amateur so called photographer.





ahh, i know. not the usual complains about school from me this time. i'm just tired of it. don't want to talk about it, think about it, or write about it....and guys? what guys? -_-" oh that's right. one who likes me but i don't like in return and one who i like but doesn't know i exist. such is the life of Che Thai.

you know what i want to do now?! become a doctor for the US army :] yay or nay, che buddies?

I love you

I love you, I love you, I love you! I love you a million times, I love you a day and for ever. I love everything that you are composed of, every fiber, every cell, every neurons that unmistakeably make you the perfectly flawed person in my life. I love the way you breathe, the way you talk, your lingering laughter, the intensity of your eyes, the curve of your lips, your slight gesture...everything.
But I'm not in love. I've never been in love.

The Days Without Guys - Year 2 Day 252

I feel a sense of comfort when I'm staying up late, without a word.
without a word, I am able to reflect upon myself
without a word, I am able to touch the deepest part of my emotions.
without a word, I am able to truly myself.
without a word... how i miss thee.

am i a baby for crying over this?
am i a baby that just needs to learn people's opinions are not important?
i am just a baby.

i just wanted people to know the real me.
to look pass my mistakes in life.
to love me with a forgiving heart.

i just wanted to be accepted....

growing up...

makes you realize certain things. it makes you sacrifice certain things. it makes you gain certain things, makes you love certain things, makes you loose certain things. but never once, does it fail to give you memories.